Young Justice Road Trip
by Ender The Time Lady
Summary: "Well... That takes care of Wally." "Why am I not suprised-" "EYES ON THE ROAD!" "F*CK YOU!" Because the thought of the entire team jammed in to a car for several hours is priceless. I have no idea where this is going, but it's going to be pretty freaking hilarious. And sweary. They swear a lot. Just as a warning.
1. Eyes on the Road!

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: For the record, I haven't seen any of season 2, because the the time skip is crap. So I may screw a few things up, seeing as this occurs during the time skip.

"Sooo... remind me why we're doing this again?"

"Because reasons."

"Really Rob? Really?"

"Shut up Wally."

Artemis groaned.

"Would you both shut up?"

"Never!"

Roy whipped his head around.

"All of you-"

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

Roy snapped his head back.

The Young Justice team, plus Roy, were on an epic road trip of epicness. It wasn't going well. Roy was trying to be the responsible adult, while driving, Kaldur was in shotgun attempting to keep order (and failing). Artemis and M'gann were behind them, and the other three boys were in the very back.

In other words, it was chaos.

Only one hour in and Roy had almost crashed twice, Conner had gotten all pissy when someone mentioned monkeys, Kaldur was trying the get gum out of his hair, Artemis was studying for a test she had coming up, and Wally was chewing gum at superspeed.

"But seriously, why the hell are we bothering with this? We could just take the Bio-Ship." Wally complained.

"No, we couldn't. Their systems can track it, as well as superspeed. So if we want to be stealthy, we have to go on a roadtrip. Otherwise we may as well advertize our every move to them."

"Right... got that.."

"Look, would you both just-"

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

Silence.

"Soooo... Anyone wanna play spin the bottle?"

SMACK

"Well, that takes care of Wally." Robin said, poking Wally's unconscious body.

"Why am I not suprised-"

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"I AM LOOKING AT THE ROAD!"

More silence.

"Can we get McDonalds?"

"Ooh! McDonalds! I'll take 20 hashbrowns!" Wally said, popping up.

"Crap, he's awake." Artemis scowled.

"Who thought this was a good idea?" Conner said finally.

"Flash, Superman and Green Arrow thought it'd be fun."

Conner and Roy started scowling in unison.

"Great. Figures Ollie would do this-"

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"WALLY!"

"I'm really hungry."

"Second it."

"Third it."

"Food does sound good."

"Whatever."

"I would also like something to eat."

Roy sighed.

"Can't argue with that." He pulled on to an exit, driving in to a town.

"Where are we?"

"Nobodygivesashitsville."

"Hilarious."

'No seriously that's what it's called."

"Son of a bitch, you're right."

"What do you want to eat?" Roy said, cruising down the main street.

"McDonalds!"

"A&W!"

"Dunkin Donuts!"

"DQ!"

"You know what, this is a vacation. Blizzards for everyone!"

The minivan was filled with cheers.

T-T-T-T-TIME SKIP!

"I regret nothing."

The minivan was splattered with ice-cream and cookie dough. Robin was finishing his Blizzard, somehow immaculate. Wally and Artemis were completly coated in ice-cream, and Roy had to pull over after the windshield was hit.

"We're never doing this again." Roy said as he scrubbed at the windshield.

I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO MAKE A BREAK LINE SO DEAL WITH IT.

"This is boring."

"I'll turn on the radio..."

"I COULD BE SLEEPING IN, I COULD BE LIVING IT UP, I COULD BE SITTING AT HOME NOT GIVING A FUCK!"

"Never mind."

"Fail. So much fail."

"Shut up."

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"Really?"

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"FUCK YOU!"

"I think it would better if I drove for a while..." Kaldur said slowly.

AN: Will Kaldur get to drive? Will Conner snap? Will they ever get ice-cream again? Why are they swearing so much? And what the hell is their mission anyways? All that and more in the next installment of Young Justice Road trip!


	2. Duct Tape of Doom

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: Wow. All of the reviews and favourites from you guys has probably made this my best story ever. Seriously, one day in, eleven reviews and eight favourites. That's a new record for me.

Anonymous Review Responses

HowDoUNoImNotMe: Yeah, I started watching a bit, Bart's a badass, but them killing off Arty and making Kaldur evil kinda turned me off again. Although double Roy action should be sweet.

GIRLWONDER: Actually, about half of the time he was looking at the road, and they were trying to piss him off. And thanks, I do try to write decent comedy!

LET THE STORY BEGIN!

Kaldur was now driving, and Roy was skulking in the passenger seat. Artemis had given up on studying after Wally and her started flinging ice-cream at each other, Conner had fallen asleep, and Robin was typing some code stuff on his laptop. That or he was on Hacker Typer, nobody could tell, seeing as the lucky bastard had one of those internet sticks. Wally was currently in a rather awkward position, seeing as he and Artemis started making out, and Robin used duct tape to stick them together, which annoyed them both greatly.

When I say it annoyed them greatly, I mean they were screaming and swearing at Robin while the youngest just laughed.

M'gann on the other hand had decided to stay out of the fight between the human members of the team, and was messaging Raquel, who was back at the cave with the worst case of the flu man kind has ever seen.

That upset Kaldur greatly.

No comment.

R-R-RRRIIIPP!

"ROBIN YOU LITTLE SHITHEAD I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Artemis howled, ripping her face free from the duct tape at last

Robin put on an appropriate 'Oh-Shit-I'm-Fucked' face.

The blonde archer undid her seatbelt, lunging at the ninja, her boyfriend not far behind her.

Conner woke up.

Kaldur attempted to find somewhere to pull over, while Roy howled in laughter at the battle.

M'gann closed her laptop.

The three humans rolled around on the floor, throwing punches at each other, and saying things that I'd just have to censor anyways if I typed them down. That or I'd have to switch the rating to 'M', and nobody reads 'M' rated parodies.

"LADIES, LADIES, YOU'RE ALL PRETTY! NOW STOP FUCKING FIGHTING, SIT DOWN, AND EITHER GROW A PAIR, OR GO FUCK YOUR SELVES IN YOUR MOTHERS BED!"

Everyone turned to look at the person who had just screamed

"What." said Robin.

"The." continued Wally.

"Fuck." Roy finished.

M'gann had been the one who yelled.

AN: And the nice girl snaps before the tough guy! Although to be fair, he's snapped repeatedly through the show, while M'gann's been bottling it up the whole time.

Next chapter features Bitch!M'gann. Roy and Kaldur duke it out in a manly fight of manliness, Conner might need some new pants, and I may or may not actually figure out where they're going, and what they're doing. I do have a vague idea, but I don't want to spoil it for you guys at all.

Hope you enjoyed!


	3. When Martians Attack

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: Two days, 16-ish reviews. That's called success. I think. To quote medic from TF2:

"I HAVE NO IDEA!"

BEGINETH THE STORY TELLING

By now Kaldur had found a place to pull over, and everyone was turned to stare at the pissed off Martian girl.

"M'gann? Are you all right?" Conner said hesitantly.

" 'M'gann are you alright'? Yes I'm fucking alright! I'm sick and tired of this shit, and I'm not going to let it happen anymore. I'm done being captured, I'm done being flirted with, and I am done being that one nice girl. I don't want to help, I want to kick ass. Starting with yours." M'gann snarled out, jabbing a finger at Wally. "Unless you don't have the balls to fight me. After the mission's over, it's a fight to the first blood. Got that bitch?" she said, grabbing Wally by the collar.

The speedster let out a mute nod, mouth open and eyes popping in terror.

"Good. Now then, I'm going to drive, and there's nothing you can do about it, so move over!"

Kaldur numbly got out of the van, walked around to the back, and sat down in the middle.

Beside M'gann, Roy looked like he was about to have a heart attack, while Artemis and Wally were holding each others hands in panic. In the very back, Connor was going in to shock, Kaldur was having a panic attack, and Robin looked like Christmas had come early.

M'gann started to drive. Roy started to scream,which lasted a few seconds before M'gann mentally knocked him put, tied him up, and threw him to the others.

Kaldur fainted, and Conner wasn't far behind.

The remaining three looked at each other, Wally and Artemis unanimously shoving aside the bodies to sit in the very back.

"Wow, who knew M'gann was a good driver?" Artemis whispered.

Wally let out a strange combination between a squeak and a mumble.

"She's not actually. I hacked the controls, I've been driving this entire trip, and I still am."

"WHAT! YOU MEAN WE PISSED OFF ROY FOR NOTHING-"

CLANG.

Wally fell to the ground, direct result of M'gann levitating a frying pan to knock him out.

Robin and Artemis soon followed, and M'gann was riding in a van full of her unconscious teammates.

The Martian girl whistled a cheeerful tune.

AN: M'gann is one scary bastard when she's pissed. And she started driving manually after Robin went down. Just thought I'd clear that up. And the first part of the rant was written by a guy on Y whose name I forget.


	4. Does Anyone Know Where We're Going?

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: In today's instalment, I'm not posting at midnight, and I finally reveal where they're going!

This chapter brought to you by my urge to have a vaguely productive day.

Robinsgirlfriend: For starters, cool name bro. And for recognizing the A:TAS quotes, you win 1000 Internetz! Huzzah!

THE STORY WILL OPEN IN 3... 2... BTZZZ

Robin woke up to M'gann poking him. Therefore he did the same thing that any sane human would do.

He screamed like a little girl, flipped over the seat, and pulled out a bird-a-rang.

"Robin, wait! I won't hurt you!" The martian assured.

"You sit on a throne of lies!"

"What... oh never mind. Look, I'm getting tired, do you think you could drive for a while?" the asked.

"Soo...you won't kill me?" Robin said slowly, still looking scared.

"No. I just had a meltdown when I first yelled, and after seeing the looks on everyones faces, I had to keep going with it."

"Seriously? What about knocking us out?" the Boy Wonder shrieked.

"Roy was giving me a headache, and I figured if it works, go with it."

"Good point. So where are we now?"

"I actually have no idea where we're going. I just kinda kept going in the same direction, but I'm lost now. I was actually, since I knocked you out." The Martian admitted reluctantly.

"Right, on it. I'll drive until Roy wakes up, and then he can drive again." Robin said, grinning at M'gann. "And didn't you hear Flash's briefing? We're going to Gotham City, the Batcave to be specific." The young ninja flipped over another seat, putting away his bird-a-rang before beginning to drive.

"Yes Robin, we all heard, but nobody actually knows where the Batcave is." M'gann said slowly.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Anyways, we aren't that far off course, but it'll still be a few days before we get to Gotham. Also, we need to find a hardware store, preferably Home Depot." Robin said cheerfully. "We need to buy the pink paint, and Home Depot has the most impressive shade of neon pink I've ever seen."

"Umm Robin? It is getting lat though, so we should probably get a hotel somewhere." the shape shifter suggested.

"So, hotel, dinner, paint, bed?"

"Sounds like a plan to me. Somewhere with a pool?"

"Duh. And water slides. Water slides are awesome!"

AN: Up next: Some poor guy has to deal with several teenagers buying hot pink paint, someone else has to get them hotel rooms, and they swim. No, you don't get descriptions of the swimsuits, because I really don't care about that stuff. But Robin gets tinted goggles, to the amusement of everyone else.


	5. Fourth Wall? Overrated!

Young Justice Road Trip

AN:I don't own Home Depot, or anything else mentioned here. Except Jimmy. I own Jimmy.

Jimmy was standing behind the paint counter at Home Depot arguing with several teenagers.

"So let me get this straight. We can't buy hot pink paint in a large quantity, because we're under 18?" the blonde girl demanded.

"Er, yes I'm afraid. We received too many complaints. Apparently we have the most stunning shade of neon pink that is usually used in pranks."

"Fuck you!" the ginger shrieked, before getting smacked by the midget.

A second redhead walked up, rolling his eyes at the others.

"Ugh, I'll deal with this. Here's my I.D." he said, flicking a card at Jimmy.

"Name?"

"Roy Harper."

"Age?"

"Eighteen."

"Sober?"

"Yes."

"High?"

"No."  
"Enjoy your paint."

Jimmy watched as the seven dragged out an entire shopping cart full of paint.

"Why do I get the feeling I'm going to regret this..."

Brushing off the feeling, Jimmy went off to his other job. At a hotel. With a pool. That had waterslides. And saltwater to boot.

Poor Jimmy.

COMMENCE WITH THE CHANGING OF LOCATIONS! ALSO, THIS IS A LINE BREAK.

The team walked out of Boston Pizza, with Wally eating all of the mints they got with their check. Roy had paid, seeing as he's all filthy rich and stuff, although Robin had slipped him some cash, also being filthy rich, not that the others knew that. They all got in to the car, and began driving around aimlessly.

"So, what are we looking for in a hotel?" Wally asked, sticking his head up front.

The team was now sitting with Roy driving, Robin beside him, Wally and Kaldur in the middle, and the girls plus Conner in the back.

"We're looking for a hotel-"

"Three stars minimum!"

"Fuck off Robin, but yes, three stars minimum-"

"A pool with water slides!"

"You're right, but can it, and-"

"And preferably saltwater."

"Don't you start Kaldur! But yeah, that's what we're looking for." The ginger archer finished turning around to glare at Robin.

"EYES ON THE-"

"Were you going to say road Wally? Because if you were, god help you."

"Nevermind."

"Yeah that's what I thought."

"OOH! LOOK! OVER THERE! A HOTEL WITH A SALTWATER POOL, AND WATER SLIDES!"

"10 bucks says he's only interested in the continental breakfast."

"Arty, babe, I love you and all, but I feel like ripping your head off right now."

"Shut up Baywatch."

"Get a room you two! Actually, how are we going to set this up? Should the couples share rooms, and then everyone else just partners up?" Roy said randomly, pulling in to the hotel.

"Actually that sounds like a good idea. But there will be no fluffy descriptions of the night, got that!" Robin yelled.

The others just stared.

"Oookay then..."

"Me and Baywatch will probably just yell a bit, then sleep, in separate beds you perverts."

"And Conner and me will just have some stupid fluffly 'I wuv you' scenebefore sleeping, in seperate beds you perverts."

"I can't sleep in sunglasses, or a mask, so I'm not sharing with anyone."

"I suppose me and Kaldur are stuck rooming together. AND THAT DOES NOT MEAN WE'RE GAY! KALDUR AND RAQUEL ARE TOGETHER! GOD YOU PERVERTS, I GO ON FANFICTION! BESIDES, I'M BLATENTLY SCREWING CHESHIRE!"

"Roy! You're smashing the fourth wall again!"

"Oh, sorry.

"YOU'RE FUCKING MY SISTER!"

Poor Jimmy. He should probably take a convenient break around now, or- nah, he's checking them in, the poor bastard.


	6. Insert Witty Chapter Title Here

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: This marks my first chapter not featuring the team, but still featuring their insanity. Also, I only own Jimmy, John, and Helga.

AND NOW, FOR SOMETHING COMPLETLY DIFFERENT

Seven teenagers walked in to the hotel Jimmy worked in, prompting him to let out a (manly) screamas he recognized them. The midget in sunglasses recognized him as well.

"HEY! JIMMY!"

Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit.

"Jimmy? Where!"

Oh shit oh shit shit shit.

"Found him! Jimmy, c'mere! Thanks for the paint by the way!"

Shit shit shit shit.

"Jimmy? Do you know these people?

"Yeah John, barely. I sold them paint at my other job earlier today." Jimmy said, looking at his co-worker and husband. Yep, Jimmy's gay. And married, because he lives in one of the awesome states that lets people marry, regardless of gender. Don't ask where, I'm Canadian. But that's not the point, now is it? Moving on!

The older ginger- Ron? Roy? Walked up.

"Hi, I'd like- um..what is it.. four! Right, I'd like four rooms, preferably right beside each other, for one night."

"Alright, that'll be 465 dollars."

Roy paid, and the group wandered up to their room, the sounds of their argument trailing behind them.

"Seriously, you can't just bluntly say you're fucking my sister!"

"But I am."

"That's not the point!"

"Oh, there's a point. Avery hard point if you catch my drift. Mostly inside your sister."

"EW, ROY! THERE'S KIDS HERE! ROB'S ONLY THIRTEEN!"

"WALLY IF YOU DON'T STOP COVERING MY EARS, YOU'RE A DEAD MAN!"

"Wow Artemis, getting your boyfriend to prove your point?"

"FUCK YOU!"

"I'd rather fuck your sister, but thanks for offering."

"THAT'S IT!"

Jimmy heard some loud smashing sounds as the teenagers broke something. It sounded expensive.

"OH GOD NOT THE FACE!"

Jimmy's palm met his forehead.

"I hate my life and everyone in it."

John gave him a mock hurt look.

"You don't count."

"Damn right I don't!"

One of the maids walked in.

"I'm going to have to clean that up, aren't I?" she said, gesturing towards the screaming.

"'Fraid so Helga."

"Crap. Can wait until they leave?"

"ROY HARPER I'M GOING TO CASTRATE YOU WITH A RUSTY SPOON!"

The three employees gaped in the general direction of the yell. Finally, John spoke up.

"Go nuts."

AN: Will Artemis find a spoon? Will Robin ever get to listen to everyone else talking? Will Roy's balls survive? Will I locate the plot? Have we ever had a plot? Will I ever shut up? Is Eric the father of Mavin's alien love child? All that and more, in the next instalment of Young Justice Road Trip. Well, not the alien baby thing. I have no idea where that came from.


	7. Near Death By Bad Driving

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: Celebrating the seventh chapter of YJRT. Seven is my lucky number. This chapter brought to you in part by drunken JL members and awesome music. Also, sorry for not updating in a bit, I wasn't sure where to go from the hotel, that's all. Well, I also had some ideas, one of which is still being typed. Anyways, I'll shut up now.

HUZZAH! THE STORY HAS BEEN DOUBLED!

The next day the team was back on the road, with Roy sitting a little more gingerly, a side affect to being canned twice in a row by a pissed blonde archer with a grudge. He was also back to driving, while Conner had claimed shotgun, the girls in the passenger, and the remaining dudes in the back.

The boys in the back were going over battle plans for infiltrating the Batcave, the girls, Roy and Conner occasionally adding their input on things.

"Alright, so painting the vault needs to be handled by me, Roy and Artemis. You guys, especially Conner, could get hurt really badly in their." Robin said, scribbling some things down on a pad of paper and marking part of the blueprints.

"What could possibly hurt a Kryptonian? Or a Martian? Or a Flash?" Kaldur said, giving Robin an odd look.

"Oh, nothing really, just the guns we have down there built to defeat every single member of the league. Which would also take down you guys."

The team stared, Roy and Conner turning around to gape at the Boy Wonder.

"Do I want to know why you-"

"YOU'RE IN THE WRONG FUCKING LANE EYES ON THE ROAD OH SHIT CAR!" Artemis screamed.

Roy whipped his head back around, yanking on the steering wheel.

"Happy?"

The occupants of the minivan looked like they were about to piss themselves. Robin just gave a silent nod, mouth hanging open in shock and terror.

"Holy crap. You're a worse driver than me." Wally said in amazement.

"Shut up."

"Can we find a bathroom soon?" Conner said cautiously.

"No. Hold it in, bladder of steel." Roy snapped, shooting the clone a glare.

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"WALLACE WEST YOU ARE A DEAD MAN!"

"MOMMY!"

"Do any of us even have mothers?" Robin said randomly. "Because mine's dead."

"So's mine." Roy said.

"My mom's in jail for child abuse." Wally said quietly.

"Grown in a test tube from a dudes DNA."

"She's back on Mars."

"Killed by Black Manta."

"Paralysed from the waist down."

"Huh. Go figure. We should start a club or something." Robin said cheerfully.

"Pass."

"My mom's still alive!"

"That's nice Arty."

"Wait a second. What did you say about your mom Wally?" M'gann demanded out of the blue.

"Umm... she's in jail for child abuse." he mumbled out reluctantly.

"As in, abusing you?"

"Maybe."

"That's horrible!"

"Tell me about it."

"MOVING ON!" Robin shrieked, slapping blueprints down.

"You do know nobody will pay attention to you, right?" Kaldur said, raising his eyebrows at the youngest member.

"You're paying attention, aren't you?"

"I'm sitting beside you, that's different."

"Fuck this, I'm taking a nap." Roy grumbled.

"FOR GODS SAKE MAN YOU'RE DRIVING!"

"Oh. Right. I knew that."

"Sure you did Roy. Sure."

"Fuck you Wally."

AN: And that's how you write a chapter after thinking "Oh, shut, I should update this." at 4 in the morning.

Look Ma! No sleep!


	8. The Promised Drunken Heroes

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: I realized that I forgot to include wasted League members last time. Allow me to correct the problem now.

MEANWHILE, IN SPACE...

"Hey. Hey Shuperman. Supey Supey soup man. You know what would be aweshome?" Green Arrow slurred, staggering forwards and grabbing the Kryptonians shoulder.

"What would'be aweshome Arrow? Would... would it involve me getting naked with Loish? Cause she's fucking sexy."

"Nah, nah, nah, way better than banging that reporter chick. Besides dude, you got competition, some asshole called Clark Kent likes her." Ollie whined back.

"Can you keep a secret?" Superman said, staggering forwards a few feet.

"Yeah man, I got your back."

"Bullshit. I ain't telling you nothing!"

A few other members of the league stood watching, several of them filming.

"This going on Youtube?" Canary said, holding in her laughter.

"Obviously. I guarantee a thousand hits by lunch." Hawkman said.

"Featured video, probably."

"Almost definitely."

"They'll kill us."

"Naturally.

"Painfully."

"Of course."

"I regret nothing."

"Neither do I."

BACK IN THE CAR...

Robin suddenly burst out laughing.

The entire team slowly turned to look at him.

"EYES ON THE ROAD!"

"GOD DAMMIT WALLY!"

"Robin, why are you laughing?" M'gann said slowly.

"New video uploaded to Youtube. Green Arrow and Supes got wasted." It's already up to fifty thousand views, and it was just posted today!" Robin said cheerfully, showing the video to the rest of the van.

HONK!

"FUCK ROY, PAY ATTENTION TO THE ROAD, NOT THE WASTED SUPERHEROS!"

"Yes _mum_." he said, glaring at Wally.

"If I was your mom I would've pulled a Casey Anthony on your ass."

"You're a dick, you know that right?"

Robin gave a small noise of annoyance. He was ignored in favour of drunken superheros.

The video finished, everyone laughed, and an awkward silence reigned supreme.

"Hey M'gann, what would happen if a mosquito bit you?" Robin said randomly, looking at the Martian girl.

"I have no idea. I guess it would die from the unfamiliar blood or something. Why?"

"Oh, no reason. Just random curiosity. Do the bites itch?"

"No, not at all."

"...Fucking lucky Martians."

"That's racist!"

"It's mosquito's, anything goes."

"Touche."

AN: Superman and GA will never hear the end of this, Lois and Clark will be very awkward at work tomorrow, and I have managed to write up an update roughly a few hours after the last one. Like a boss.


	9. Sarcasm Fails

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: Yet another update written at some ungodly hour after I spent the night watching Spiderman. Go figure.

LET THE STORYING BEGIN

By now Kaldur had switched back to driving, with the rest of the team splayed out in the back.

"Really, shouldn't we have seatbelts?" M'gann said, looking nervous.

"Don't worry about it M'gann. Kaldur's great at driving, and besides, what's there to hit, a cow?" Robin said cheerfully.

"Ugh, I'm bored!" Wally moaned, sliding across the floor.

"Quote fest?"

"Fuck yes. Roy?"

"Always."

Robin chucked a metal ring that they had for god knows why on to Wally.

"Hey, I got the thing on the thing! What do I win?" The Boy Wonder said with a smirk.

"You!"

"I win me? Well that makes no sense."

"Robin..." Artemis said, glaring at him.

"Sorry."

"What should be sorry for?"

"Being annoying."

"Quote fests aren't annoying."

"Sure they aren't Roy."

"Glad you agree with me."

Everyone stared at him.

"Oh goddamit that was sarcasm, wasn't it."

"No shit Sherlock."

The team was silent for a bit.

"Hey, why the hell are we swearing so much?" Wally said randomly. "I mean, we never use this language at home or in the cave."

"I have no idea."

"Beats me."

"Should we stop?"

"Fuck no!"

Awkward silence here.

"HOLY SHIT BATMAN!" Robin screamed suddenly. The entire team gave him odd looks before letting out a unanimous groan.

"Robin, I'm not sure what's worse. That pun, or the cow shit." Artemis said.

"Quick Kaldur! Hit a cow!" Wally yelled.

"He's not going to hit a cow because you asked." Conner said, giving Wally a strange look.

"Plus, then the smell of crap would be mixed with rotting cow parts." Roy added.

"GOAT!" Kaldur yelped, swerving the car around said goat.

The team smacked in to the wall before landing in a heap of tangled limbs.

"See, this is why we should have worn seatbelts." M'gann hissed in anger.

The pile of limbs quickly ejected her, the episode from the day before still clear in their minds. The Martian girl brushed herself off before sitting down in shotgun.

Kaldur gave a concerned look behind him.

"Are you guys alright?"

"Fine dude. Just focus in driving."

"Who's hand is that?" Artemis snapped.

"Sorry." Wally mumbled before moving his hand.

AN: Next chapter we celebrate our tenth chapter! (Insert trumpets here)

It might take a bit, because I'm on vacation, and I might as well make the tenth chapter extra long or something.


	10. Hint: Help Provided in Earlier Chapter

Young Justice Road Trip

AN: TENTH CHAPTER! WHOO! Also celebrating the fiftieth review, so let's make this chapter extra awesome! Special thanks to sunflower13 for making up Giselle Louisa Quackenbush.

UBER SPESHAL FUN CHAPTER TEN TIME BITCHES!

"I am SO. BORED." Roy whined. As if on cue, a mysterious swirling portal of hot pink sparkles appeared in the van.  
"What the fuck is that thing!" Wally shrieked. Suddenly a person fell out, crumpling on the floor.

"I suddenly feel a random urge to protect you mystery person- wait, what?" Roy said, confused. The person stood up.

"LYKE OMFG HAI IM GISELLE LOUISA QUACKENBUSH ADN IM LYKE SOOOOOO TTLY AWSME!11!1!111!" The girl shrieked, twirling in her sundress and bouncing her ridiculously big chest.

The Team stared.

"HO ME GAWD UR ROY HARPER UR MAI TWUE WOVE!11! LUK IM HAWT AND SHEMXY AND CUUUTEEE AND MUDEST AND HAWWT AND EVERYEON LUVS MEH BCUZ I AMMM SOOOOPER KAWAII!111!111!"

There was a faint popping sound as any and all hints of Roy's manly pride vanished.

"You are so hot let's go out and make babies and marry and make love and have babies!" Roy giggled. The two then joined hands and flew through the window.

The team stared. Finally, Robin spoke up.

"What the fuck just happened?"

"I have no idea, but my sister will brutally murder her, whoever she is."

"OH GOD, IT'S ALREADY STARTING!" Wally screamed, eyes wide in terror.

"Dude. What are you talking about?"

"That was a Mary-Sue, the most hated breed on the internet. They're female characters that display the authors image of perfection, and get paired with the most desirable guy, or sometimes girl. After they arrive, the other characters begin to change. The girls become ugly, retarded, jealous bitches, or her personal fanclub. And the dudes instantly become tall, muscly, and obsessed with the Sue. I'll be turning stupid any second now,despite my love of science and marshmallows. Hey, are clouds made of marshmallows? They're so fluffy, I bet they'd taste good- NO WALLY, SNAP OUT OF IT!" The speedster yelled, beginning to hyperventilate. (AN: The Sue has gotten in to my mind, forcing me to make an annoying authors note in the middle of the fucking story, which everyone hates. Just thought I'd say that if this story makes you hyperventalate, then you should probably see a doctor, or stop reading. Just a heads up OMG MOAR REVIEEEWWSSSAAH! FUCK SHE'S IN MY HEAD! _**AH OH GOD NOT THE FAAACEEEEEE**__EEEEEE_EEEEEEeeeeeee... hElLo ThErE IM DA AUTHRESS OF DIS STRY NAOW ND IT WIL B3 WAAAAY BTTR DAN DAT SHTY GURL ENDR SHES NT EVEN HAWWT LYKE MEH! ANEWAS IM DA SOOPER KAWAII DESU AWSME ATHRSS NOW ND MAH NAM IS GERTRUDE WITHERSTOCKING PUDDINGSPARKLE, TEH MUST BOOOOTIFUL NAM ON DA INTRWEBZ! ANYWAS INJOY DA WAAAAAY BTTR CHPTER DAN EEENER HAOD PLLNED 4 U!)

ENERD DA STOPID WRTER WAZ WRKIN ON A STRY. "HAHAHAA IM SOOO SMRT DIS ES SOOOO FNNY PPL WLL LUV DIS CRP!" SSHE SAD IN HER RSTY VOCE. DEN DA MAAAGICAL ANGEL AUTHRS GURTRUDE WITHERSTOCKING PUDDINGSPAARKLE PWNED ER WIT DA MAGICZ OB FENDSHIP AND CAP. AND DEN MICHENERD (AN: U C WAT I DID DER IM SMRT PLZ LUV ME) WENT OF 2 B DED ND 3VRY1 LAFFED. BAC IN DA STRY ROY WAZ WITH HEES TWO WOVE GISSELE LOUISA QUAKENBUSH, MY SELF INSERT DAT EES PEFECT ADN KEIND IN ERY WAAY

_Back in the van..._

The Team, and Ender, had barricaded themselves in, with the Team making fortifications, and Ender keeping the sane by using decent grammar and writing to hold off the onslaught of capital letters.

"Just hold on guys! I'll have the tenth chapter special underway in no time! For now, just cower in here with us. It'll be boring, but it should be free from Mary-Sues." Ender said, looking at the crowd.

SiLLy NeDeRy DeR iZ nO eScApE

"Oh god it found us! How did it breach the defences?"

DeRs AlWaYz a WaI 4 mEh

Enders writing failed, and the Team passed out from sheer stupidity.

"No! Please! You're my only defence from... it. Please don't go!" she cried out, desperately shaking their limp bodies.

DeY r DeD nAoW pLoT tWiSsT!

The evil author advanced on the cowering Ender, who summoned up the courage to write one final Authors Note.

AN: Please, join the battle against the thing! Focus logic and flames towards the thing, and it will shrivel up and die! Then without the power source, the Sue controlling Roy and the Team will be easy pickings. Hurry, before it get's inside of here as weEEELLL MOAR REVEWS PLS WONT UPDAT UNTL AI GT FIFTI GAZILON REVIWS GIV DEM OR ELS!

Ender looked around at a completly blank white space, with nobody around.

"Hello? Anyone?"

Silly Ender, did you really think you could win? You're trapped inside the story now. No way out until the next update. And believe me, when you see what I have planned for you, you'll be begging for a hiatus...

"You won't win! My reviewers will save me!"

Oh I really doubt that. Have fun floating in the nothingness for a few days! Because it will seem like a vacation after the next chapter.

"This has to be a dream..."


	11. Flamethrower of Logic!

Young Justice Road Trip

Ender looked desperately around the small white room she was stuck in.

"How do I escape my own story?" she mumbled. Then she noticed a small black mark near the bottom of one of the walls.

"What the... oh!"

It was a number four.

"What's the weakest part of my story? The fourth fucking wall!"

She began to ram into the wall with her shoulder, smashing in to it repeatedly until a crack appeared. Ender smirked.

_Back In The Van..._

Kaldur, M'gann and Conner slowly woke up.

"Ow my head- HOLY SHI!" M'gann shrieked.

In the few hours that they'd been out the van had become rusted and decrepid, the other members of the team had vanished, and the paint was gone too.

"How long were we out? And where'd the others go?" Conner demanded, halfheartedly poking one of the seats.

"I think it was the Sue." Kaldur said.

"But why'd she take the paint?"

"And leave us?"

"The portal thing that she came through was hot pink, right? That's how she got in here then, and before we were knocked out. She teleported through the paint!"

"That doesn't explain why we're still here."

"Simple. Sue's usually ignore us, because you're the most obvious couple ever, and I'm too boring according to them. The Sue's going to be fucking Roy, and she'll probably either make Robin and Wally her harem, or she'll make them gay for each other. Artemis will get portrayed as a jealous bitch, Zatana as a whore, and Raquel usually doesn't exist."

OMG HOW U FIGR OT PLUT SU FST!

"She's watching us!"

OFF CRORS I AM. U GYS R 2 SMRT 4 UR ON GUD. U MST DI NAOW!

Suddenly Ender smashed through the one of the van walls in a hail of cinder blocks and concrete. The wall behind her instantly formed back together.

"Okay that was weird. AND GET OUT OF MY STORY!"

ENERD! HW U ESCAP MI HITAUOS!

"The fourth wall bitch. Now get out!"

Mak Meh.

"None of the Young Justice members are gay, your writing is horrible, there's no plot, you have never heard of grammar or spelling, and your OC is a Sue.

NO SE IZ NT SHEZ SOOOPEER SAAAD CUZ HR PET SHEP DED WEN SEH WUZ LITL! AND U DONT NED GRAMER ND SPELNG ON FF IT NT SKOOL!

"Seriously? Sheep? Your an idiot, and you should always use spelling and grammar. Please. Stop writing."

U MENI IM CALIN DA PO PO ON U BUULY ULL GO 2 JAL AND BE SAUD AND IM DLETIN MAH ACUNT DO THER!

The writer, vanished in a depressed black cloud. Ender grinned, as her authoress (and narrator) powers returned.

Alright! Let me just get things fixed up here...

Ender pulled out a flamethrower of logic, and fixed the van back up, before disappearing to take out the Sue.

_One Ass-Kicking Session Later..._

"Well that was... disturbing."

The Team was sitting outside of the Cave. Roy was recovering from a mental breakdown, M'gann, Conner and Kaldur were watching everyone with amusement, Robin and Wally were desperately using up bottles of mouthwash, kissing their respective girlfriends, and stubbornly not looking at each other.

Anyways, now that that's been taken care of, let us begin the Tenth Chapter Special! Whoo!

"Um Ender? It's chapter eleven."

FUCK.

"Hey, what the hell happened to all the paint anyways?" Wally asked.

Um... Well... uh... You'll see.

Robin shrugged, and the Team walked towards the door. After the scanner said their names, and some numbers I don't remember, they walked in to the cave.

"SON OF A BITCH, I'LL KILL THAT SUE!"

"She's already dead."

"I'LL KILL HER AGAIN!"

The entire mountain was hot pink.

"Fuck this, let's go camping. All in favour say aye. Aye!"

"_**AYE!**_"

AN: The Road Trip is over, the Sue is destroyed, but we aren't done yet. Not by a long shot. Join us again for YOUNG JUSTICE CAMPING TRIP!


End file.
